The Victim Partnership

The Victim Partnership

No one is immune. We all experience hardships. What’s the difference between those who deal with difficulties head on, learn, recover, and move on, and those who fall apart, become overwhelmed, and give up. In other words, Victim Partnership. And Navigator Partnership.

What’a Victim Partnership? About 20-25% of Partnerships fit the description of Victim Partnerships. The Victim Partnership Beliefs:

• We’re screwed.
• We can’t fight City Hall.
• The competition got there before we did.
• We didn’t catch a break.
• It wasn’t our fault.
• Luck wasn’t on our side.

The Key Point: Victims give away power. Something happened to them, causing the upset and failure. They think “We don’t have control; We never really did.”

What’s the Payoff? If it’s someone else’s or something else’s fault, we aren’t responsible for what’s happening. Victims rarely examine their own behavior, take personal responsibility for their choices, or stop justifying their predicament.

Victim Partnerships aren’t aware that they are always responsible for what happens, that they are always in charge of their choices and actions, and that they always have total power over their lives. They may not have control over the result but they do have control with every step leading up to the result.

Bottom Line

  • Victims tend to find each other out—The needy partner finds a controlling partner, a scared partner finds an acting out and risk taking partner.
  • Their common denominator is:

I’m not responsible.
It’s not my fault.
Other’s did us in.

  • So qualify your potential partners and find out if he/she takes personal responsibility for their results. •
  • If he has a history of blaming other or justifying why things haven’t turned out successfully, cut the conversation off, get out, and find someone else who is personally accountable.
  • Watch out for the resentful and angry person. They may be victims waiting for their next failure.